Guy #1: "...and I think I need to lose 60 pounds. Or at least convert some weight into muscle." Guy #2: "Well, what's your motivation? What's driving this decision?" Guy #1: "To be honest...

Guy: (on cell) "And they kept talking about how they knew each other from a dating site. Great. I got you trumped. My wife blew him. Who wins NOW?" - Orange Line...

Girl: (on cell) "Yeah, dad. There's a confirmed case of the flu. Right. Yeah. I'll be careful that I'm among the 99% of people who actually survive. You feel free to keep freaking out... -...

Girl #1: "You must be high to think he's not using you." Girl #2: "But he likes me. He just doesn't know it yet." Girl #1: "So you're going to keep going?" Girl #2: "If he has to like me...

Guy #1: "I'd rather fight Milton Bradley." Guy #2: "But he's a big dude. And he gets into that stuff a lot." Guy #1: "But he's also torn his ACL getting ready to fight. The odds of that...

Guy: "Next!" Girl: "I'd like a soup/sandwich combo." Guy: "Which soup do you want?" Girl: "Which soups do you have?" Guy: "See that big ass board behind me with all of our items? You may want to read it before you waste my time. ...

Girl: "Ok, so the point is: rats have fur, and furriers can make any fur look like gold." - Michigan Ave, near the Tribune building -- Submitted by Midori

Guy: "White dudes, they wear whack shoes, whack clothes. I see them, they're wearing ratty-ass shirts, ratty ass pants; but they get money, so it don't matter. White people got whack hygiene in general; but they get money, so it don't matter!" -...

Girl: "I said, 'You're with your wife?' And then he asks me why I didn't congratulate him. For what?" - Ravenswood -- Submitted by ecobox

Girl #1: "...and then I saw that bitch walking out of THE GAP!" Girl #2: "Oh, gross." Girl #3: "She doesn't deserve life." - Corner of Oak and Rush -- Submitted by Matt F.