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Painting Chef

Cheaper than therapy.
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On losing my optimism.

Nov 23, 2009
Through no desire of my own, Patrick and I ended up taking a “month off” from our seemingly never-ending quest to de-barren my uterus when we went on our vacation. At the time, I thought it would be no big deal. Of course I had to deal with the...

Why my desire to clean my house makes my heart weep.

Nov 12, 2009
I would apologize for my absence with tales of some fabulous adventure… you know… if I had one. But sadly, I’ve been sidelined not by wild parties and amazing travel but by a pig. No. Thank you. This is not a case of bacon overdose. I...

An attempt to keep the playing field even.

Nov 4, 2009
“Hey man… what’s with the facial scruff? You’re kind of hairy!” “I TOLD you on Saturday. I’m observing No-Shave November.” “Really.” “Well, I’m leaving my options open.” “This should be fun. Hey… maybe I’ll...

Bringing the noise.

Oct 30, 2009
I had this whole idea in my head to talk about how difficult it can be during the holidays to bounce back and forth from family to family, all the while trying to keep everyone happy but barely underneath the surface you are CRACKING THE FUCK UP and I...

I'm sure you could imagine some appropriate music in the background as I try to sort out my entire life for the internet to see.

Oct 22, 2009
I have a to-do list that is threatening to knit itself into a scarf, come to life and wrap it’s asshole self around my neck and choke the life right out of me. I have deadlines and projects and dirty laundry and kitchen clutter and holy guacamole...


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