Total Flanker

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Spirit of '73

Total Flanker posted an article on - Dec 6, 2009, 3:15 am
The Barbarians first victory over the All Blacks since 1973 yesterday is being hailed in the press as an example of how rugby can still be played with verve and excitement and a return to those halcyo...
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Coventry cling on

Total Flanker posted an article on - Dec 5, 2009, 12:17 pm
What a 1st season for the newly formed Championship - first London Welsh, then Birmingham Solihull and now 135 year old Coventry RFC going into administration. And it could have been much worse for C...
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NOOOOooooooo!!!!!!!!

Total Flanker posted an article on - Dec 3, 2009, 5:35 pm
England Rugby Supporters - what on earth are you playing at???? You went out in your thousands in 2007 and bought the horrendous ketchup swish kit and now, according to the RFU, sales of England'...
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And another thing...

Total Flanker posted an article on - Dec 1, 2009, 5:13 pm
Not only did New Zealand's pure white change kit put the English Purple and Welsh Yellow monstrosities to shame, I'm also mightily impressed that the All Blacks are still refusing to countenan...
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All in the mind

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 30, 2009, 6:35 am
There's plenty of tearing of hair and gnashing of teeth going on, it seems, about the state of the game of rugby today. It seems that far too much kicking, not enough tries, no entertainment and ...
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The Total Flanker Guide to: Refereeing

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 26, 2009, 12:48 pm
Ahah, this old chestnut - cynical, gnarled old forward pontificates on the appalling standard of refereeing these days and tells referees where they are going wrong and how to do their jobs... Far fr...
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Flatman for England!

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 24, 2009, 4:37 pm
It's official - this blog likes David Flatman. Not only is he, in this blog's humble opinion, the best loosehead prop currently available to England, he is also the complete anecdote to the u...
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November: the Verdict

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 23, 2009, 12:48 pm
I'm not sure what to make of England's November. In an ideal world Martin Johnson would have wanted to build on the undoubted momentum created during the 6 Nations. With so many frontline pla...
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Well done England

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 22, 2009, 4:36 pm
England Women, that is. Catherine Spencer's England team beat New Zealand 10-3 at Twickenham on Saturday, thus drawing the two-match series. England's first win over the Black Ferns since 20...
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Growing Pains

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 21, 2009, 5:46 am
As a young man I was often to be seen sporting a lurid Hawaiian shirt. I liked to be different, I thought that somehow it gave me my own identity and separated me from the crowd. The fact of the matt...
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Crossbar challenge

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 21, 2009, 5:05 am
Saracens are £250,000 poorer after a 24 year old 5th XV hooker from Welwyn RFC won the "crossbar challenge" competition held by the club at Wembley this week. Stuart Tinner hit the bar with a punt f...
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D.I.S.R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 17, 2009, 3:52 pm
It's heartwarming to see that it's not just the Kiwis that get hot under the collar about their traditions being "disrespected" - now the Saffas are at it. The SARU are up in arms about the f...
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Lessons II

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 16, 2009, 1:41 pm
Lessons from England's desperate victory against Argentina: Please refer to Lessons from defeat to Australia. Lessons obviously learned - not. Here's the XV that Johnno should (but won't...
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Purple Haze

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 14, 2009, 5:33 pm
Well, all I can say is thank heavens I missed most of the England effort at Twickenham yesterday. Fortunately I spent the majority of the afternoon soaked to the skin in the face of a gale watching Ch...
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Invictus?

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 14, 2009, 12:44 pm
I clearly haven't been paying attention. Last I heard this movie was called The Human Factor. It's now called Invictus and, given the subject matter and the fact that Morgan Freeman is in it, ...
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Paul Doran-Who?

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 10, 2009, 4:30 pm
I like to think that I have my finger on the pulse when it comes to what's happening in English rugby. Imagine my surprise therefore to learn that England had called up Paul Doran-Jones into their...
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Lessons

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 9, 2009, 1:30 am
1. Ugo Monye is in no way, shape or form an international fullback. Time for Johnno to trust Ben Foden in the 15 shirt. 2. Matt Banahan is not the answer. What was the question? 3. One day we may le...
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At it again

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 7, 2009, 5:38 am
Yes, it's time once again for the good folks of Wales to be told how they must react to that traditional piece of rugby pantomime, the Haka. All-Black centre Ma'a Nonu is this year's nomi...
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Those were the days

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 7, 2009, 5:26 am

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Chip off the old block

Total Flanker posted an article on - Nov 5, 2009, 4:43 pm
Martin Johnson on Courtney Lawes: "Someone sent me a text saying he's a bit like I used to be, except more athletic, funnier and better looking..."
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Would you let your kid play rugby?

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 31, 2009, 12:31 pm
In an article in the Telegraph last week, rugby journalist Mark Reason says that he doesn't want his 10 year old son to take up rugby because "the rugby field has become a far too dangerous place....
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Purple

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 30, 2009, 11:42 am
Those attending the England vs Argentina match at Twickenham next month will witness the debut of England's new change kit. And it's PURPLE! Setting aside the need for England to wear a chang...
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Calendar Boys

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 28, 2009, 1:46 pm
According to recently sacked Ewen McKenzie, his lack of success at Stade Francais was nothing at all to do with the fact that he is a crap coach, but instead was all the fault of owner Max Guazzini wh...
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A letter from Graham

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 24, 2009, 6:29 am
Confused about the new All Black coaching structure? Read on to discover the rationale behind the changes... Dear Steve & Wayne, I’ve just had a brilliant idea. Seriously. You know we’ve been ...
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Not my finest hour and a bit

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 18, 2009, 12:17 pm
First game of the season yesterday and I played like a drain. It all looked very promising when I turned up at the clubhouse to learn that Ruislip Vets had cried off and that, instead, we were facing...
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A question of judgement

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 16, 2009, 11:05 am
I see that Times' journo Stephen Jones still isn't convinced about the qualities of England skipper Steve Borthwick, claiming this week that the Sarries player wouldn't make his top 6 lock...
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Missing a trick

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 14, 2009, 6:23 am
So, Rugby (at least the shortened version of the game) is to become an Olympic Sport in 2016, along with Golf. I must admit that I've never really been a huge fan of Sevens. I hated playing it as...
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36

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 8, 2009, 12:56 pm
No, sadly not my age (I wish). 36 is, it turns out, the nickname given by Leicester Tigers' skipper Geordan Murphy to new recruit Billy Twelvetrees. Why 36? Because, if you say it in Murphy'...
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Rolling, rolling, rolling...

Total Flanker posted an article on - Oct 4, 2009, 12:39 pm
Amongst the news recently has been: the suspended sentence handed down by the FFR to Mathieu Bastareaud for telling porky pies about his "assault" in Wellington in June. An eminently sensible decision...
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If at first...

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 30, 2009, 5:15 pm
Good luck to Manchester RFC when they take on Otley in National Div 1 this Saturday. Why? Well, take a look at their last 4 league results: vs Wharfedale, lost 124 -5 vs Blaydon, lost 145-12 vs Nunea...
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Scrum Queens

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 30, 2009, 4:58 pm
A new women’s rugby website covering the international game has been launched. The site – http://www.scrumqueens.com/ - will cover the international women’s game at both 15 and 7 aside level. T...
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45

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 28, 2009, 6:36 am
Happy Birthday to me... Forty-five years old today and utterly underwhelmed. Perhaps it's because of my age, perhaps it's because 2 friends of a similar age have sadly passed away this year a...
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The world according to Graham

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 26, 2009, 5:22 am
The Right Reverend Graham Henry. Don'tcha just love him? According to him the reason New Zealand have been rubbish so far this season is all down to the laws, specifically the fact that the ELVs ...
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Money for old rope...

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 23, 2009, 12:29 pm
According to the RFU's newly launched 'This is Rugby' campaign, the sport's core values are: Teamwork Respect Enjoyment Discipline Sportsmanship Apparently this "ground-breaking ...
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Are we there yet?

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 19, 2009, 12:28 pm
Is it really over? Has "the 3 teams playing amongst themselves for an eternity" tournament finally finished? I confess I've seen very little of this year's Tri Nations but that in no way pre...
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Keith Floyd RIP

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 19, 2009, 7:54 am
Farewell to Keith Floyd, TV chef, bon viveur and passionate rugby man who died earlier this week. Floyd quaffed his way through his TV programmes in the eighties and I have to say that his "Escalope ...
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The Waka

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 18, 2009, 5:21 pm
It has emerged today that, following a reprimand for making inappropriate gestures against Bath last weekend, Wasps' David Lemi has been commissioned by the club to develop a Wasps-centric version...
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Top 20

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 18, 2009, 12:30 pm
It was with some astonishment that I learned today that my humble little blog has been included in Telegraph Sport's Top 20 Rugby Union websites. It's utter nonsense of course and totally sub...
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HALLELUJAH!

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 17, 2009, 12:24 pm
It's gone, it's finally gone. The RFU has launched the new England rugby kit today and that unmitigated design disaster - the horrendous red swoosh of ketchup - has been consigned to history. ...
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Fit for Rugby?

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 16, 2009, 12:20 pm
There are a bewildering number of highly scientific and specifically tailored fitness programmes out there for would-be rugby players, but I must admit that I find myself agreeing with The Times' ...
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Of Volcanos, Camels and Wolves

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 11, 2009, 12:29 pm
Just when we thought we might be able to focus on the rugby again after a summer of scandal, up pops Lesley Vainikolo in the dock at Bristol Crown Court charged with inflicting GBH. The 17½ stone be...
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Small beer

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 6, 2009, 12:28 pm
It was revealed this week that the reason that the ARU sacked Lote Tuqiri last year was because he broke strict team rules by taking a woman to his Wallabies hotel room. At the time, Tuqiri was on hi...
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Isn't it ironic #3

Total Flanker posted an article on - Sep 1, 2009, 5:37 pm
I was tickled pink by the news that Harlequins' first match of the season against Wasps at Twickenham on Saturday will be refereed by none other than................wait for it................. De...
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Big Bad Deano?

Total Flanker posted an article on - Aug 31, 2009, 3:01 am
One of the most ridiculous things to emerge from the whole Bloodgate saga so far is the ongoing demonisation of Dean Richards. It would appear that, despite evidence of widespread skullduggery, all o...
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Isn't it ironic #2

Total Flanker posted an article on - Aug 30, 2009, 3:22 am

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Isn't it ironic...

Total Flanker posted an article on - Aug 29, 2009, 12:50 pm
Is it just me, or is there a delicious irony in a certain Lawrence Bruno Nero Dallaglio being named in the 13-man RFU "Image of Game Task Group" charged with restoring the game's reputation in Eng...
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Here come the girls...

Total Flanker posted an article on - Aug 29, 2009, 4:11 am
Being on the ball as ever I missed the fact that last week marked the one year countdown to the kick-off of the Women’s Rugby World Cup in England. Hosts England are ranked second after losing narro...
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The scandal that refuses to die...

Total Flanker posted an article on - Aug 26, 2009, 12:28 pm
The Quins "Bloodgate" saga refuses to go away, and if the latest revelations from the transcript of Tom Williams' evidence to the ERC appeal committee are close to being accurate then the position...
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Raking over the Ashes

Total Flanker posted an article on - Aug 25, 2009, 5:02 pm
Quick couple of words off-topic regarding the recently concluded Ashes series. Obviously delighted with an English victory but more impressed in fact with the muted celebrations and what seems like a ...
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Pre-Season training?

Total Flanker posted an article on - Aug 24, 2009, 12:51 pm
Good to see that Gavin Henson is taking pre-season training seriously! It looks very much like he's adopting the Total Flanker "Drink Yourself Fit" approach, which is more or less how July and Au...
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