Debbie T.

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Following Blogs: 9

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What Is It That I Am Looking For ?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 31, 2012, 9:34 pm
Someone, and a very smart someone, I might add, asked me one time "what is it that you are looking for?"  I was going through infidelity and heartache with my ex at the time. I was hurting so much and didn't really think too much about the question until one day after I got tired of crying my eyes ...
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Looking Back At Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 24, 2012, 8:14 am
I look back at the hard times that I went through infidelity with my now ex. Times were hard. We were both working and the kids were young. Today I breathe a sigh of relief that the pain and suffering of his cheating is behind me. I will never forget what he did to me, to our family, and to my self ...
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Chocolate And Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 18, 2012, 8:12 am
Sometimes in the middle of dealing with infidelity, we MUST stop and take a little bit of time out for ourselves. There became a time when I was just so tired of dealing with the pain that I didn't think  I would ever come out of it all....but I did. How does one come out from such hurt and heartac...
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Divorce Law

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 9, 2012, 1:13 pm
Sometimes we hang on, and in my case, I hung on way too long. Sometimes things are able to be worked out, and that's great as well. I know what it feels like to keep trying, and trying, but am the only one to be working on my marriage, and it really hurts when your other half just doesn't seem to ca...
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Somehow, Things Really DO Get Better

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 5, 2012, 10:05 pm
During the Christmas holidays, our daughter came home from her Navy base and after she had been home for awhile, he finally called her.  He wanted to see her, but he actually didn't call to see her until the evening before she was leaving. She had been home for nearly 2 weeks and he waited until it...
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Another Christmas, Another Year Of Getting Past Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Dec 14, 2011, 6:43 pm
Here I am, another year of being without my ex.....which means another holiday NOT having to worry about whether he is with his other woman or where he is. Christmas is and has always been a very special holiday for me. I love the traditions and the feel in the air of everyone being nice to each oth...
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Having Good Credit

Debbie T. posted an article on - Dec 8, 2011, 9:42 pm
One thing for certain,  if you are thinking about getting out of a relationship due to your partner's infidelity, is that you have good credit.  Having good credit  is something that is a must in today's world. I knew when I left, that my credit needed to be in good shape,  so I checked out my Â...
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Holidays And Living With Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Dec 8, 2011, 7:52 pm
How does a person who's going through infidelity and all it's pain get through the holidays?  I know how hard it is because I have been there.  For the many years that I went through holidays, pretending to be happy when I knew things weren't  good. I had children so I had to make the best of eve...
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My Past Feelings Of Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Oct 17, 2011, 7:08 am
Although much time has  passed, I feel as though it's been a true lifetime that I was in this relationship. Gone is my life that was full of stress. I still remember the days when he came home from work, and me quickly going through his phone and writing down numbers and listening to the other wome...
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Time Lessens The Pain

Debbie T. posted an article on - Oct 11, 2011, 11:26 pm
It has been a little while since I wrote in my blog, not because I haven't wanted to, but it seems that life just finds so much for me to do these days. I am not abandoning my blog, but trying to rebuild my life, and all is well. I never ever would have thought that while going through the pain of i...
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A Time Of Happiness, Yet Sad

Debbie T. posted an article on - Sep 13, 2011, 10:27 am
Today I am feeling quite melancholy. I don't think that I have felt this down in a while, and it's not about infidelity this time around.... while I have been working hard at getting my life back, settling into a nice comfortable spot without my ex, learning that life can REALLY be great, I am facin...
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Protecting Your Credit From Fraudulent Use

Debbie T. posted an article on - Sep 2, 2011, 7:51 pm
I just wonder sometimes if I didn't have any close friends or family to help me with financial questions and such after the split up....what would I have done? One very important thing  is to maintain good credit ratings. Not only does that mean starting up new credit, and maintaining your old cred...
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My Ex Came Over......

Debbie T. posted an article on - Aug 25, 2011, 7:19 am
Wow...what a shock to my life...he actually came over to the house. This man has never had much time for anybody else except himself and his other woman, but he  managed to come over yesterday. He came for a very good reason....to see our daughter. Her 18th  birthday passed about 10 days ago and h...
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Our Daughter Is Now A Grown Woman

Debbie T. posted an article on - Aug 18, 2011, 5:55 pm
Our darling daughter became an adult this week...and I am so very proud of her. This young lady has really come along way....from the shy, quiet little girl who loved her daddy so much, to a beautiful young woman who is not only confident and outspoken, but certainly not shy anymore.  And yes, she ...
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Can You Be Happy Being Single?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Aug 1, 2011, 7:06 am
Can someone who's been in a relationship a long time actually be happy single? Being in a committed relationship, or married gives you a secure feeling that you are not in this world alone. You have someone to talk to at home, someone to share the covers with, dinner partner and and all around compa...
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How Long Does It Take To Move On After Infidelity?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jul 22, 2011, 11:33 pm
How long does it take someone to actually move on after the break up of a relationship or marriage due to infidelity? I have seen it in my different timings....in my own, it seemed like it took forever. I just had a very hard time getting myself to open myself up to anyone else. I had to learn to ge...
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Learning To Love Life After Going Through Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jul 15, 2011, 10:54 pm
I feel as though my life has come around in a circle. When my ex and I first got together, we were so very happy. I thought that there was no other feeling of joy like it. What went wrong? Why don't marriages now-a-days seem to last? And if they do, what are the secrets to making it last? Looking ba...
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Learning How To Walk Through Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jul 6, 2011, 12:25 am
After having gone through such heartache from my ex, I think that alot of how you get through it is by how you deal with the hurt from it. Do you dwell upon your partner's infidelity to the point that it drains you? I can honestly say, I did !  I carried such emotional turmoil with me for such a ve...
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Looking On The Other Side Of Infidelity And Heartache

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jun 25, 2011, 3:21 pm
Did you ever wonder, while you were going through the pain and heartache of infidelity with your partner, that you would ever come back on top of things? I did, and for a very, very long time, I didn't know if I would ever get over him.....no matter that he hurt me, cheated on me, lied to me and tor...
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On Again....Off Again, That Darned Ex Of Mine!

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jun 20, 2011, 9:56 am
After feeling like something wonderful has been accomplished (him showing up to our daughter's graduation), our daughter started feeling like her dad was showing some interest in her life. Father's Day was yesterday, and I happened to mention to her about calling him to let him know that we had pict...
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Peace --Finally And Our Daughter's Graduation

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jun 16, 2011, 7:42 am
I don't know why, but it just seems that alot of things have changed since the last time my ex and I broke up. Time really does heal the heart, for the most part, and there are still those certain things that I will never forget but my life is really happy now. He came to our daughter's graduation w...
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My Ex Actually Showed Up To Our Daughter's Graduation Ceremony!

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jun 7, 2011, 10:20 am
It was graduation night for my daughter, and my ex had called earlier in the day to find out where the ceremony was going to be held...wait, did this mean he would ACTUALLY show up? When I told him that it was going to be outside in the football field, he started making excuses about how it would ju...
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Emotional Cheating? Is It Cheating?

Debbie T. posted an article on - May 22, 2011, 5:49 pm
I have been asked if I feel as though emotional cheating is cheating on one's other half.....in my opinion--YES. Not only does it take away what you should be getting from your spouse, but it makes the other person feel the withdrawl...at least most of the time. In my situation, my spouse did not li...
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The Agony Of Breaking Apart

Debbie T. posted an article on - May 16, 2011, 7:20 am
Oh ! the agony of people splitting up, jealousy and rage! Someone close to me, which has to remain nameless, is going through all of this agony. He and his wife were only together for three years. Things were fine, up until the time that she decided to start snooping into his past. Why? Why all of a...
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Why Did I Snoop Into His Personal Things?

Debbie T. posted an article on - May 3, 2011, 9:25 am
Long ago are the days that I felt like I had to snoop around in his cell phone....as well as some other things I am not so proud of; such as following him in my car to see if he was really going where he said he was, looking in his work van for any and all hidden money, perfume and things I shouldn'...
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Finding Happiness

Debbie T. posted an article on - Apr 19, 2011, 10:16 am
Today I am in a pretty good mood and thought that I would reflect on what's going on in my life. I am very happy with how things are at this time. I have a beautiful daughter who's getting ready to graduate from high school, I have a great sister who listens when I need her to, I have friends who he...
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Our Daughter's Going To Graduate? Will He Show Up?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Apr 14, 2011, 6:52 pm
Now it's winding down close in time for our daughter to graduate from high school....she even got the invitations in a few days ago. While we were going through the list of who are going to get the invitations, of course, she wanted to give one to her dad. I am honestly ALL for it !  The only probl...
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And He Decides To Call Me NOW !!!

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 30, 2011, 4:08 pm
And here I sit, after my series of how to get over the agony of infidelity, and guess who calls me? Yes, it was the ex-husband, right out of the blue.  I know that he doesn't have a clue about my blog, as he doesn't even know how to operate a computer, and I have never given his name.....he just ca...
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Becoming A Stronger Person After Infidelity.

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 28, 2011, 7:46 am
After all the things that I went through and suffered with that man, I became a stronger woman. I had to learn to love myself again. I had to begin a healing process that I never thought I would journey into. I had to learn that he was all talk and no action. He wanted me to be there as a convenienc...
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How I Got Over The Agony Of Infidelity.....part 5

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 26, 2011, 7:27 am
Things in my life were crummy, and I didn't feel good most of the time, but I felt like I had to do something to change things..and he wasn't helping any. He would go through periods of time where he would be gone alot, to staying at home. I think he was trying to work against my mind, curious as to...
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How I Got Over The Agony Of Infideltity.........part 4

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 24, 2011, 7:18 am
I had to accept the truth....and that was, that my husband was a cheater. No longer was he considered "mine". Terribly hard to accept, but I had to find a way to get through his infidelity. I started talking to a long time family friend of my parents, who just so happened to be a pastor in a small c...
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How I Got Over The Agony Of Infidelity......Part 3

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 22, 2011, 7:07 am
I bet you are wondering WHY I had a blind eye, when it came to infidelity....well, sometimes its feels better to try and believe the best in your spouse...after all, isn't that what we are supposed to do when we love someone? My husband (now ex) was charming, and he knew all the right things to say....
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How I Got Over The Agony Of Infidelity.....Part 2

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 20, 2011, 6:56 am
How did I manage to get myself through all the pain of infidelity? Well, first of all, you have to be able to get past the part of the initial shock that your spouse would ever even think of cheating on you. That initial shock might take a long time, and maybe longer than you want, but honestly, som...
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How I Got Over The Agony Of Infidelity? Part 1......to be continued

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 18, 2011, 6:47 am
Going through infidelity is one of the hardest things to have to go through in life.  Sometimes I wonder how I ever made it through. My heart was soooooo torn into pieces and I was so out of sync because I wanted to stop all the crazyness and just stop my husband's infidelity. No matter what I did,...
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Soon To Follow.....5-Part Series On How I Got Over The Agony Of Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 17, 2011, 7:44 am
I will be starting a 5-part series of  how I got over the agony of infidelity. I know that everyone will go through their journey differently, and some of us will mend quicker than others. It took me such a long time that it felt like an eternity. Loving someone and being in a committed relationshi...
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A World Full Of " IFS"

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 15, 2011, 12:58 am
I had to go into the city where my ex moved into with his other woman today. I got dangerously close to "their" house. I haven't seen him in a very long time so I was hoping that I would not run into him. What IF I had seen him? How would I have reacted? I honestly don't think that I would have been...
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Almost A Lifetime Away....

Debbie T. posted an article on - Mar 8, 2011, 7:31 pm
As much suffering as I have done, I look back at everything that I have been through. Was my marrying him a mistake? Would it have been any different if we had just stayed a couple without the paperwork? Nobody knows the answer to that and I suppose that guessing would only just stir up the feelings...
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Not Everyone Cheats !

Debbie T. posted an article on - Feb 22, 2011, 5:31 pm
According to today's statistics, there are more cheaters out there these days and so many marriages broken up over them....however, I wonder if there were just as many cheaters way back in the day and we just didn't know about it because back then everyone just seemed to stay together, and divorce w...
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Could You Be Friends With Your Ex?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 21, 2011, 6:17 pm
Is it possible to stay friendly with your ex when he/she has really broken your heart with infidelity?  First of all, if you have children together, you must maintain some kind of "niceness" between you to make sure that your children don't suffer from the fall out.  Children are so precious, and ...
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Here Is A Link That Lists 50 Blogs And Resources For Coping With Infidelity

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 11, 2011, 9:14 am
I got up this morning, going through the emails when something caught my attention...an email from a man named Michael who let me know that my blog was included on his  list  of  the top 50 blogs about  infidelity....wow!  I am amazed at all of the sites he found. . I just want to say   "than...
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Finding The Joy In Life

Debbie T. posted an article on - Jan 5, 2011, 12:06 am
I look at all the experience I have had in this lifetime and I wonder why I was never able to see what was right in front of me when he was cheating. I mean, I may have seen the signs, but they still hit me like a ton of bricks. Never ever in a million years did I think he would actually cheat on me...
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Is He Looking Back At His Past?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Dec 27, 2010, 11:12 pm
The child support is late, but it's getting better....he is finally trying to make it up by paying a little extra on this month and the next and I hope that he continues. Our phone conversations are "of no more" these days but I have heard from him twice, to let me know about the extra on the child ...
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Another Holiday Season ......

Debbie T. posted an article on - Dec 14, 2010, 11:37 pm
Here I sit, so close to Christmas, with Thanksgiving already passed,  now feeling  so much stronger. Long gone are the days that I have to worry about Christmas coming and him  only participating  just enough to get by...another reason for my happiness, is that I don't have to wonder how he's go...
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Is There Really Anybody Out There Who Lasts In Marriage Anymore?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Nov 14, 2010, 11:47 am
Honestly, through the news media, tv and radio, all I hear these days are about couples who just don't make it. And there's sooooooo many of them that end because of infidelity. What's with it these days? What ever happened to marriage that lasts til death do us part? Does it even exist anymore? My ...
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Why Do We Always Remember The Good, And Sometimes Forget The Bad?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Nov 4, 2010, 12:08 am
I look back at my past relationship and for a long time, I wanted it to work so badly, that there were times that he hurt my feelings terribly, and I would eventually go back with him, forgive him and all of a sudden, I was missing the "good" in us and not focusing so much on the "bad". Why do our m...
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Cheating, Cheating, Cheating.....

Debbie T. posted an article on - Oct 10, 2010, 4:37 pm
What's up with all this stuff in the news and it's always about someone cheating on their spouse or loved one.  Why is that?  What seems to be going on with people who just can't seem to find happiness with their spouse?  Is there anything that can be done about it? And aren't you tired of hearin...
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Could I Have Prevented His Cheating?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Oct 3, 2010, 4:44 pm
Sometimes I have to wonder and ask myself, "could I have prevented his cheating?"  and for a long time, I took the blame, worried about how things might have been and beat myself up over this man, that I loved dearly, but felt that he needed to cheat on me. I felt lost without him, and it took me Y...
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Is Anything Uncomplicated In Life?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Sep 26, 2010, 11:22 am
Sometimes I wonder what's going on in this world... I look around and see so many of my family and friends going through marital problems. I just have to wonder what's going on. I saw on the news that the most reasons that people divorce are due to  cheating and money problems. Why do people get so...
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Are You Getting What You Want From Your Relationship?

Debbie T. posted an article on - Sep 6, 2010, 11:02 pm
Everyone wants and deserves to have a great relationship...are you getting what you want from it? What things are most important to you? I think that  being able to trust your partner, respect is also way up high on the list of things for me. Being able to have the respect shows you that they hones...
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The Dating World Seems So Scarey Sometimes

Debbie T. posted an article on - Aug 28, 2010, 10:53 pm
So, how do you actually start getting back out into the dating world again?  That seems to be a large question but not sure about the answers. How do you know when it's time? I guess that all depends on how quick you actually get over your past situation and how soon you think that you are ready to...
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