Heidi W.

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The ceiling didn't cave in

Heidi W. posted an article on - Jan 9, 2012, 9:04 am
So, I visited a church yesterday. GASP! I know, I thought the ceiling would cave in as well. We were invited by the mom of a friend of my son (he is 13). He had his friend come and stay overnight on Saturday, and so we took him to his church on Sunday and my son and I stayed for the Sunday Schoo...
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Churchless

Heidi W. posted an article on - Jan 4, 2012, 4:23 pm
We are still churchless. It has been about 4 years now since we have regularly attended a church. We have visited our old church several times now due to necessity. Once our girls were in a dance program there. And the other time was when our oldest daughter was baptized there. I have to say, i...
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Could it be (late stage, neurological) Lyme's Disease?

Heidi W. posted an article on - Sep 28, 2011, 9:02 am
I’ve been sick for about 5 years now. I don’t mean not feeling well… I mean down and out. Done. Toast. I could barely get out of bed for a year, could hardly walk due to muscle weakness and tremors, and I was losing more and more physical and mental function all of the time. I started los...
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Sometimes

Heidi W. posted an article on - Sep 26, 2011, 8:19 am
“Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down.” ~ Unknow author
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Life, Asperger's, and School Budget Cuts

Heidi W. posted an article on - Aug 30, 2011, 8:52 am
So my 2 kids were diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder over the summer.   My 12-year-old son was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome.  My 7-year-old daughter was diagnosed with PDD, Asperger’s variety.  The difference is slight… it has something to do with the speech delay that the little...
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My children whom I love

Heidi W. posted an article on - Jul 12, 2011, 8:00 pm
I have 4 children. 2 of them were diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome… a mild form… last Thursday. I’m overwhelmed, but it isn’t a diagnosis that scares me. It breaks my heart for how difficult things may be for them. I adore both of them so much. I want life to be easy for my kids, bu...
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Never apologize for what you feel. It's like saying sorry for being real

Heidi W. posted an article on - May 16, 2011, 10:11 am
I love this saying I found today (I don’t know who said it). I wonder why people are always putting down how they or others feel. And why we often apologize for how we feel. Well, at least I do.  So here is what I’ve been mulling over today. How many of us feel guilt for our emotions? Well… ...
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The search for a diagnosis continues.

Heidi W. posted an article on - May 11, 2011, 10:20 pm
My neurologist who was working so hard last winter to get me a diagnosis moved away, and I haven’t found a new specialist to help with that yet. I did visit an internal medicine/ lyme’s doctor today. He is going to do some testing, but I had an elevated RF and sed rate. Who knows that that me...
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self deception

Heidi W. posted an article on - Apr 19, 2011, 5:23 pm
It is frightening, the human propensity towards self deception. And even more so how we seperate ourselves from all guilt and responsibility so long as we get what we think we have to have at all costs. In the end it isn’t worth the expense of the consequences and yet we still try to avoid any bl...
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Demanding submission that is not freely given is not leadership…...

Heidi W. posted an article on - Mar 1, 2011, 9:39 pm
Demanding submission that is not freely given is not leadership… it is domination and control. You know what I’m talking about if you have ever been coerced, manipulated, intimidated or forced into going along with something you knew was wrong, or even you weren’t sure about but didn’t dare ...
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Fog

Heidi W. posted an article on - Jan 17, 2011, 11:04 pm
That’s the thing about depression: A human being can survive almost anything, as long as she sees the end in sight. But depression is so insidious, and it compounds daily, that it’s impossible to ever see the end. The fog is like a cage without a key. ~Elizabeth Wurtzel
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Moving forward or backwards?

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 19, 2010, 6:17 pm
We’ve visited our CLB twice now. My little girls were in Christmas programs there, so we’ve attended the last two weeks at the church we left so long ago after the abuse we went through there. I haven’t even begun to process my emotions. Being there was both bad and good. Good was seeing...
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and you?

Heidi W. posted an article on - Oct 14, 2010, 5:50 pm
How has God worked in your life lately? I know that in my life, He isn’t always “obvious,” but always present, whether I see it or not. Sometimes there is a great moment, that I know is a miracle. Other times it is a simple thing that happens and I realize He is reaching out with a gentle...
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and so it goes

Heidi W. posted an article on - Oct 4, 2010, 12:11 pm
Our testimonies are our stories, and usually contain some reference to how God was with us, helped us, and got us to where we are today. But they don’t end there. Every day is a new way to see how God is working. A new chance to move forward, fall flat, or slid back downhill, hopefully not star...
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The third side

Heidi W. posted an article on - Oct 3, 2010, 11:12 pm
Wow, what a week I’ve had. Here is my unselfish side that stays with a friend no matter what, and my selfish side that wants to scream and rail and run, battling it out with one another.  The unselfish and loyal side won, but at a high cost to the other.  Good luck making sense of the rambling, ...
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sorry about the whining

Heidi W. posted an article on - May 7, 2010, 7:46 am
I feel like a whiner. Sorry if it came across that way. I was just really overwhelmed yesterday. How is everyone doing?
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the nothingness

Heidi W. posted an article on - May 6, 2010, 5:32 pm
There is a nothingness of the soul that can grip a person. An existing. A putting one foot in front of the other, doing that which needs to be done without really interacting with the world around. A mask can be slipped into place when needed, but only for brief periods of time. Too much energ...
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life goes on

Heidi W. posted an article on - Apr 6, 2010, 8:09 am
Viewings and funeral is over and we are back to daily living. Spring break is over. We spent time with my father-in-law going through some things, and just hanging out. Now the kids are back in school, and we are back to the grind. My kids have lost their second close grandparent in less than 2 ...
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We'll miss you, Rita

Heidi W. posted an article on - Mar 18, 2010, 7:54 pm
My mother in law passed away last night. The family made the difficult choice to remove life support when complications made it clear that she wasn’t going to be able to ever come off of the ventilator that was keeping her alive. We will be gone over the next several days for the funeral service...
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Way behind

Heidi W. posted an article on - Oct 16, 2009, 11:12 am
I’ve been trying to catch up a little from my long absence… but y’all talk (write) a lot! So I’m finding my self deleting a lot just to get to the point I can read current posts. Anyway… working on it.
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Interesting happening

Heidi W. posted an article on - Oct 13, 2009, 10:29 am
Today I’m hurting all over from this damn fibromyalgia, so I’m laying low. Hope you are all doing great.
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Doing a bit better?

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
Having a good few weeks. I’m not really sure why, but I’m able to run my kids everywhere they need to be. I’m in and out 3 and 4 times a day right now with swimming lessons, gymnastics and other activities, and surviving it. I hope it lasts! I even worked out (gasp) for the first time in 4...
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Here we are again

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
My mother-in-law went in to the hospital for a rather simple procedure on Thursday, and may not wake up. Her breast cancer re-occurred, and metastasized to her lungs. She is 2 hours away, so I’ve been driving back and forth and my husband has been staying there on and off. We just went through...
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still looking

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
Heading to Cleveland Clinic next week in my search for a cause to my physical problems. I’m sure nobody else has ever done this, but I’ve had a heck of a week. My neurologist had casually mentioned a test result to me that had me freaking out about going into renal failure when I got home and...
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If you join my church I will love you

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
This is how the conversation usually goes… Them: Hey, how are you doing. Haven’t seen you in awhile. Where are you going to church at? Me: Well, we aren’t going anywhere at the moment. I’ve been dealing with some serious pain and chronic fatigue issues for years now.  I’m going to ...
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not on top

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
I’ve back-slidden, fallen off the wagon, whatever you want to call it. Not because I’ve fallen into some sort of sin, or started drinking, or something like that. No… it is because I’ve grown complacent. The illness that caused me to stop reading/praying/searching was valid. But now? No...
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Acceptance? Maybe…

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
Have I been judgmental of disabled people?  I never thought so… but I’ve never been one either.  Until the past few years.  But I’ve been judging myself for my lack of ability to do anything.  I’ve berated myself for my laziness and motivation, kicking myself… trying to make my body do...
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I'll love you, even if you don't attend my church

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
So the other day I talked about my experience with people only loving those willing to join their church, or their circle.  I mentioned a specific conversation I had with a person where I was rejected for their ministry because I wasn’t “attending” a church (and even though I explained my he...
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Living the hermit life

Heidi W. posted an article on - Dec 31, 1969, 7:00 pm
Honestly, it has been so good for us to live the hermit’s life the past few years.  Well, almost.  We see my mom, and one of my sisters rather regularly.  In fact, my sister and her 4 kids have stayed with us on and off the past few years.  That means 3 adults and 8 kids in the house.  If the...
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