J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 8, 2012, 11:34 am
Midwest, USA  Seemingly out of nowhere, Santorum is sweeping the midwest primaries. (Click cartoon for larger version) Really?  We might go from “President Barry” to “President Ricky?”  Well I don’t like this trend, and I’m drawing a line in the sand. If we ever get a “President ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 7, 2012, 10:49 am
Wisconsin, USA (birthplace of football)  So the season’s over, and some other team is storing the Lombardi trophy for us until we take it back.  How to survive in the meanwhile? Here’s how.  You’ll need: 1) Beer.  The off-season is when we train, men.  And train hard.  Hot weather’s...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 6, 2012, 12:24 pm
Indianapolis, IN  A twenty-dollar home-made Doritos commercial shook the foundations of Madison Avenue last night. (Click cartoon to enlarge for easier reading) Oh yeah.  And there was a football game, too… If you think the guys who built Madonna should build Newt’s Moon Colony, please cl...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 5, 2012, 11:29 am
Vestal, NY  Binghampton University researchers have found that Republicans have, er, happier and more fulfilling sex lives than Democrats, to put it lightly. (Click cartoon to enlarge for easier viewing) Their conclusions are surprising, since conservatives tend to be more monogamous, while liber...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 4, 2012, 1:24 pm
Internetz, USA  It’s perhaps the best argument for Internet Censorship:  those damn duck lips. If you are at all turned on by women who look like mallards, then you, my friend, have issues. (Click cartoon for larger version) You know we’re right.  Search the Internet for lists of animals a...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 3, 2012, 11:29 am
Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania[JG]  The NOAA (National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration), the NCDC (National Climactic Data Center), and the NESDIS (National Environmental Something-Something-Something …WTF?! Why the hell do we need THREE of these?!) have teamed up to dispute groundhog weather...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 2, 2012, 12:59 pm
  Lake Geneva, WI  When deer fall from the sky, the only logical conclusion is:  They’re trained suicide attack deer being launched from military air transports. But why? Skeptics might suggest that the deer simply bounded from the steep hill adjacent to the highway.  But our investigation ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Feb 1, 2012, 11:57 am
Milwaukee, WI  In fairness to the robbers, the store did NOT post a “DO NOT ROB” sign. Aldi, the only supermarket to carry generic versions of generic products, stupidly posted a “NO GUNS” sign to discourage law-abiding citizens from shopping there, and as an open invitation to criminals. ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 31, 2012, 11:09 am
Madistan, WI  Because it was working, that’s why. Citizen review of recall petitions were invalidating 30%, 50%, and in some cases 100% of the signatures.  Of the 100 lines of Fitzgerald petitions we at the Daily Scoff reviewed last night, 69 were flagged as challenge-able. So the GAB stepped ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 30, 2012, 11:02 am
Oakland, CA  But don’t call the Occupy Oakland thugs “Communists”. (Click cartoon for larger, easier-to-read image) Their heroes are Guevara, Marx, Lenin, and Chávez.  They espouse communism.  They’ve “repurposed” Oakland City Hall as a commune.  Aside from that though, they’re ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 29, 2012, 10:28 am
HONOLULU, HI  Cast your vote! Not here.  Somewhere else, where they give a rat’s ass: (Click cartoon for larger, easier-to-read version) All I know is, if I watch either the Pro-Bowl, or the Superbowl Halftime Show, I get an overwhelming urge to shave my legs… If you think bot...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 28, 2012, 10:01 am
Green Bay, WI  It’s a “strong possibility” according to some guy named Aaron Rodgers: (Click image to enlarge for easier viewing) Hey Joe.  The Packers have a tight end you can have, too. He comes with extra thumbs… If you want to be taken to Miami, please click whatever ad appears he...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 26, 2012, 10:33 am
MILWAUKEE, WI  Did Prince Fielder REALLY say that Detroit was “way better than Milwaukee?” (Click cartoon for larger, easier-to-read version) No, no he did not.  I pretty much made that up to get you to read my stupid cartoon… If you’re not even sure who Prince Fielder IS,...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 25, 2012, 1:03 pm
WARSHINGTON, DC  For those of you who had no time to watch the State of the Union (read: “For those of you with LIVES”) this should pretty much sum it up: (Click cartoon for larger, easier-to-read version) And don’t anybody accuse me of equating the state of the union with prison butt sex a...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 24, 2012, 12:25 pm
Milwaukee, WI  If it’s too good to be true, you’ll find it on CraigsList.com And you’ll probably find the seller you’re dealing with on the Milwaukee Police Department’s crime blotter, too. (Click cartoon to enlarge for easier reading) The Romans warned you: “caveat emptor”.  ”P...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 21, 2012, 10:41 am
UNDISCLOSED BUNKER, WI  The goings on of the Government Accountability Board need to be kept private.  So the location of their bunker and its internal operations remains highly secret. Except for the Internet camera broadcasting it worldwide: (Click cartoon to enlarge for easier reading) So ye...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 20, 2012, 9:52 am
Charleston, SC  Former Governor and former Presidential candidate Rick Perry asked the guy who was formerly going to vote for him to vote for the former Speaker of the House instead, resulting in a surge of .0001% in the polling numbers for Newt Gingrich: (Click on cartoon for larger, easier-to-re...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Jan 19, 2012, 12:09 pm
MADISON, WI  He’s clearly more qualified than Scott Walker was when HE ran for governor. He has a solid track record in state leadership, and can lead Wisconsin down the path to prosperity. (Click cartoon for larger, easier-to-read version) And so, without further ado, our official endorsement...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Nov 2, 2011, 10:07 am
Ladysmith, WI  Professional undie-bunchers calling themselves the “Water Resources Protection Council”, or “WRPC” (formerly the “Wisconsin’s Environmental Egalitarians for Water Education Everywhere”, or “WEE WEE”) are up in arms, wrists limply flailing frantically, because the Fl...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Nov 1, 2011, 11:57 am
Wisconsin, USA  How come we haven’t started shooting each other yet?  It’s the first day in generations that self-defense is no longer illegal here. C’mon, people.  We were assured that once concealed carry became legal here, we’d be dropping each other like Clint Eastwood.  Would. (Cl...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 31, 2011, 9:48 am
(Click image to enlarge for easier reading) You are invited to revisit my “Scariest Halloween Ever” story from 2008 here: http://www.dailyscoff.com/children/liberal-loween-oooh-scary/ WARNING:  It is not for the faint of heart… If your kids are begging for handouts tonight (but not downto...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 27, 2011, 10:31 am
[ Click here to read the story at the Hill.com ] Washington, DC  What do you do when you’re up to your eyeballs in debt?  Try and get in all the way to your skull-cap. (Click image to enlarge for easier reading) Actually, stimulus seems to work.  My blood pressure goes through the roof every...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 26, 2011, 11:33 am
Milwaukee, WI  Being a cop is a tough job.  I’m glad other people do it.  I don’t want to and, to be honest, I probably couldn’t. Likewise, being a roofer is a tough job.  I’m glad other people do it.  I don’t want to and, to be honest, I probably couldn’t. I don’t blame either ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 25, 2011, 10:37 am
USA  Prioritize, people.  Protests, parks, and picketing can wait. (Click image to enlarge for easier viewing.) McRib sandwiches are back.  You can complain about the world all year long, but these are only available for a limited time, at participating McDonald’s, while supplies last… If ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 23, 2011, 3:22 pm
Milwaukee  If I’d made this up, my mailbox would be crammed with “RACIST!” rants.  Even more than usual, I mean. But yeah, there’s an “Occupy the Hood” movement: Ostensibly, participants in this movement would, instead of going to school or work, hang around in public streets and par...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 22, 2011, 11:32 am
Washington, DC  It’s official:  we’re pulling out of Iraq. Any remaining U.S. sympathizers in the Middle East are encouraged to ask Cambodia “What happens next?” Filming on the sequel may begin as early as next spring.  The script is, unfortunately, still being written… If you’ll w...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 21, 2011, 9:13 pm
Nobody ever likes this argument, but nobody ever refutes it, either… If you’re one of the muggers, please click whatever ad appears here –>   If not, please click twice… Thanks for helping to support the Daily Scoff!
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 17, 2011, 10:46 am
Detroit, MI  The glassy-eyed liberals sleeping in parks across the country to promote their principles (free pizza, cheap pot, and drunk chicks) are late to the party. Detroit, East St. Louis, Compton, and scores of other commune-ities across the country have already instituted what these kids dem...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 16, 2011, 12:23 pm
Because yeah, I am.  I totally am… If you’d rather watch some left-wing lunatic poop on a cop car, please click whatever ad appears here –>   If not, please click twice… Thanks for helping to support the Daily Scoff!
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 15, 2011, 4:24 pm
Silicon Valley  And here it is… Sorry we can’t show you their First Lady application (the “iPlod”) but it’s reeeeeally expensive… If your smart phone just got stupid, please click whatever ad appears here –>   If not, please click twice… Thanks for helping to support the Dail...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 12, 2011, 1:01 pm
Wall Street, USA  These people get all the attention: …while these folks actually deserve it: So shines a good website in a weary world… If you’re 99 percent appalled, please click whatever ad appears here –>   Otherwise, please click twice… Thanks for helping to supp...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 11, 2011, 10:28 am
Click to enlarge for easier reading/sharing.  Also, see the first “Occupy Wall Street” comic HERE… If you blame Wall Street for liberals pooping in public, please click whatever ad appears here –>   If not, please click twice… Thanks for helping to support the Daily Scoff!
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 10, 2011, 10:12 am
MADISON, WI  After decades of retirement, Wisconsin’s own “Big Jim and the Twins” have released their newest hit: “Segway Boy”, a musical video tribute to the most high-tech, low-brow Madison misfit in generations. CLICK HERE TO WATCH THE VIDEO ON THE (un-)OFFICIAL “SEGWAY BOY” WEBS...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 7, 2011, 10:12 am
WASHINGTON, DC  Polls show the president’s approval numbers are lower than ever. Hard to read the cartoon?  Click to enlarge… But a poll of Obama’s remaining supporters shows they overwhelmingly disapprove of that disapproval poll. However, the president’s opponents overwhelmingly disapp...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 6, 2011, 11:07 am
Milwaukee, WI & Washington, DC  Nearly 70% of Milwaukee residents disapprove of the streetcar slated to tear up the roads in Mr. Barrett’s Neighborhood, transforming the area into the Land of Make Believe People Will Use This Stupid Thing: Hard to read?  Click on it to make it bigger.  (That�...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 5, 2011, 10:29 pm
Wall Street, NY  Thousands of the nation’s unemployed have opted out of job-hunting for the last several days to hang out in Manhattan. Their agenda, if you listen to all of them, is to shut down corporations, lynch their CEOs, and take all their money.  Because then they’ll hire people.  Wi...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 2, 2011, 11:22 am
Wisconsin  The following is important information for those of you who live in Wisconsin but have no interest in sports. All of the state, county, and local news in today’s Sunday edition of the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel can be found in section “F”, at the bottom of page 17. You’re welco...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Oct 1, 2011, 10:44 am
Los Angeles, CA  Dr. Conrad Murray assured paramedics that Michael Jackson was “fine”, despite the pop star suffering from a moderate to severe case of dead. Prosecutors are trying to establish a pattern in those types of misdiagnoses, but as the defense attorneys have pointed out, Murray only...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 30, 2011, 10:10 am
WASHINGTON, DC  The latest Facebook outrage involves feigned indignity that some banks charge between three and five dollars a month for ATM fees. The result is an annual household charge of up to $60.  Meanwhile, the federal government is charging nearly $60,000 per household, or over $17,000 pe...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 28, 2011, 11:44 am
New York, NY  Did’ja ever notice that 60 Minutes is really only 42 minutes long?  I have.  The rest is all commercials.  And most of our stories are critical of “Corporate America”. Ironic, isn’t it? And if you count all the introductions, you probably only get about 26 minutes of actu...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 27, 2011, 9:54 am
Milwaukee, WI  Play was not suspended, but the Newtonian Laws of Physics were, when a spike in the gravitational pull of the infield at Miller Park suddenly began dragging players to the dirt. Unexplained increase in stadium gravity brings players to their knees; slows game to a crawl Spokespeopl...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 26, 2011, 10:09 am
Chicago, IL  Fan worries about the reliability of the Packers’ new Jermichael Finley robot were laid to rest as the bionic tight end ran roughshod over the struggling Bears at Soldiers Field*. *I know, I know.  I just like to see ‘em wince when I call it that. Chicago Bears safety Craig Stel...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 23, 2011, 9:28 am
Candidate’s inadvertent revelation jeopardizes neighbor’s pooch www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hYAWHpfLpc Taos, New Mexico  ”Papers!” I.N.S. agents screamed, kicking in the dog-owner’s door.  ”Show us his papers!” “They’re on the kitchen floor!” Johnson’s neighbor screamed. “...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 22, 2011, 10:21 am
Internetz, USA  Just don’t, that’s why. No, see, now you’re GOING to.  And then you’ll be all like “ewww, gross” and you’ll email me with “Why did you TELL me about that?” and I’ll be all “Hey, I told you NOT to!” and then you’ll go “Well, I wouldn’t have if you HADN...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 21, 2011, 10:04 am
Menomonee Falls, WI  What was your first reaction when you heard me tell you that the Menomonee Falls public high school would, beginning next month, be transformed into an Islamic Mosque for weekend worship by area Muslims? Well it’s not.  But it IS being turned into a Christian church, accord...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 19, 2011, 2:54 pm
Madison, WI restaurants. It used to be outlawed in the whole state.  Convoys of Moms would trek to and fro across the Illinois border, sneaking “da Oleo” back by the gallon tub. Republican state Rep. Dale Kooyenga calls the law silly.  And he’s right. But if all our lawmakers targeted all ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 18, 2011, 10:51 am
Milwaukee, WI Presumably, the board will examine the culpability of the cream puff stand on the possibility that the fun-loving African-American kids pounded the snot out of whitey due to an unhealthy escalation in their blood-sugar levels. Having already ruled out the influence of the M.C. Hammer...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 17, 2011, 9:34 am
Racine, WI  Here’s the official press release from Ryan’s spokesperson: http://www.winews.us/content/us-rep-paul-ryan-announces-first-district-mobile-office-racine-county-next-week Security concerns are, of course, a concern in Wisconsin due to the crazed transvestites roaming our streets.  ...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 16, 2011, 8:19 am
Madison, WI  Miles Kristan, who likes to dress like a woman in public, and who apparently has a history of disorderly conduct and drug paraphernalia possession, was issued a disorderly citation for assaulting Republican State Representative Robin Vos. Miles Kristan : Not Very Pretty in Pink Meanwh...
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J. G. posted an article on the Daily Scoff - Sep 15, 2011, 10:47 am
JAPAN  Two more earthquakes rumbled off the coast of Japan last night, leaving many worried that victims are-  Holy crap!  I just saw Scarlett Johansson’s naked ass! Yeah, yeah.  Earthquakes, economic collapse, civil uprisings, blah, blah, blah.  But dude, did’ja check out the butt on Scar...
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