John Lindauer

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John Lindauer Mar 1, 2011, 11:00 am
Woah. That's Fff'd up.

Did this judge never hear of date rape?

He should be forced to resign.
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John Lindauer Jan 3, 2011, 10:52 am
SHE GOING TO RUN!!!

(and so, we will have four more years of Obama).

she'll kill in the primaries and get slaughtered in the general. she's flat out unelectable.
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John Lindauer Jan 2, 2011, 11:53 am
Science has once again improved all of our lives.

now can we please locate the "hell yes" button?
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John Lindauer Sep 22, 2010, 10:31 pm
they're still going through the pornographic ones... you know... just to make sure they got everything... you know... straightened out.
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John Lindauer Sep 22, 2010, 10:22 pm
see if you can figure out which rock i've been hiding under...

a. awww dad. can we keep him?

b. GODDAMMIT! MICHAEL SH#T IN THE HOUSE AGAAAAIN!!!

c. Michael Vick used to fight dogs?? That dude's pretty brave. I'd never fight a dog. Those little bastards are stronger than you think.
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John Lindauer Sep 19, 2010, 10:26 pm
how many of you want everyone in america to obstain from using condoms? this chick is a loon. she's gonna get beat like an '80s buccaneer.
John Lindauer Sep 19, 2010, 10:34 pm
she got vetted by the same guys who "looked into" sarah palin. yoiks.
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John Lindauer Aug 16, 2010, 1:56 pm
It's true!

Robert Winter of Paducah Kentucky was a pioneer in the goat-app business.

his slogan: "Yup, there's a goat fer that."
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John Lindauer Aug 13, 2010, 10:38 am
yes it does you saltless bastard.
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John Lindauer Jul 20, 2010, 4:18 pm
the tea party will insure that the democrats hold the house and senate. the republicans are talking big. but the results ain't gonna be pretty for them.
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John Lindauer Jun 1, 2010, 9:40 am
MGM is dumb. this would've saved their asses. all they needed to do is go out and get independent financing - like every other studio these days.
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John Lindauer Jun 1, 2010, 9:37 am
i love israel... but damn.
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John Lindauer May 2, 2010, 2:28 pm
"drill baby dr- oh heck. what i meant to say was 'don't baby don't.' the lame-stream media has misquoted me thousands of times - and then dubbed in the word 'drill'. i would never advocate such a stupid, short-sighted non-solution."

dang.

even HER followers are smart enough to see what's happening and realize the stupidity of her position.

one by one, each of her extreme "fortune-cookie positions" will be similarly discredited, until she is forced to shut up - or become a democrat.
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John Lindauer Mar 25, 2010, 6:13 pm
what will the outfits be like! can stephen colbert sponsor a thigh!?
John Lindauer Apr 30, 2010, 10:46 am
Who will they get to do the color commentary for "the men's category?"
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John Lindauer Apr 3, 2010, 9:49 am
hahahahahahaha!

well thank god. we wouldn't want to be seen "vaporizing kidney patients!"

maybe, if the republicans are right, we should capture bin laden and force him to sign up for obamacare.

or. we could just vaporize him with a drone strike in Pakistan. (you know, the ones Dick Cheney called "foolish and reckless", which are now kicking Taliban Ass all over the region.)

read all about it in The Economist. (they call obama "the iron man" when it comes to killing terrorists
John Lindauer Apr 30, 2010, 10:38 am
Big Ben has been traded to the Taliban for Osama Bin Laden and a 5th round draft choice in 2011.

Osama, the new Steelers' QB announced that he no longer needs the "kidney machine" - and that rumors of his HGH addiction are pure fiction.

He then declared a jihad against the Cleveland Browns.
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John Lindauer Apr 28, 2010, 5:45 pm
He will now win election. This is a savvy move.
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John Lindauer Apr 22, 2010, 11:15 pm
so now romney has to 'hate himself' to get along with the far right?

i see romney going the way of charlie crist.

obama/clinton vs. palin/huckabee.

dems win.
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John Lindauer Apr 21, 2010, 11:47 am
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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John Lindauer Apr 20, 2010, 11:38 pm
remember life during Bill Clinton.... world peace... booming economy... fair taxes... 66% approval rating...)

i think the democratic party's new slogan should be:

VOTE DEMOCRAT!! (what's the worst that can happen? somebody gets a ********!)
John Lindauer Apr 20, 2010, 11:41 pm
B-J.
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John Lindauer Apr 20, 2010, 11:28 pm
oh my god!!

obama is PRIVATIZING GM!?

(now the conservatives will have to have a problem with free enterprise, too.)

oh well.

my guess is: republicans pick up 35 seats in the house and 4 in the senate. (well below the blow-out they suffered during the '08 anybody but Bush-fest).

they'll fight with obama four two more years. and have no claim to the economic recovery which they currently refer to as "the end of the world."

they'll be exposed for the frauds that they are and get kicked out... again.
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John Lindauer Apr 19, 2010, 10:14 am
didn't R2 have much hairier legs?
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John Lindauer Apr 16, 2010, 3:12 pm
day two. hour 23. "melba" completes her lap dance. but jack spots a familiar tattoo just above her hip. he leaps up from her crotch, grabs his phone and calls CTU.

"Evacuate the Spearmint Rhino! She's gonna BLOW!"

minutes later, the terrorist detonated their "dirty bomb" and 3/4 of greater los angeles was covered in herpes.

dude. THAT was an awesome two parter!
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John Lindauer Apr 13, 2010, 11:51 pm
he did.

if you recall, bush looked into putin's eyes, and saw his soul.

when in reality... if you look into putin's eyes - that light you see - is the gleaming red light of a cylon power cell.

hahahaha
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John Lindauer Apr 6, 2010, 8:37 pm
hello sandra. i'm john. coffee?
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John Lindauer Apr 6, 2010, 8:36 pm
she's hilarious and gorgeous. i'm going to have my agent call her agent, friday.
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John Lindauer Apr 5, 2010, 1:41 am
GEORGE the dog has his usual summer cut.
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John Lindauer Apr 3, 2010, 9:40 am
"leaking" a story about a celebrity?

as if it's top secret?
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John Lindauer Mar 28, 2010, 3:51 am
the bus has already hit the republican party. they just don't know it.

the democrats, on the other hand, have no internal competition.

we progressives are enjoying your right-wing turmoil.

keep up the good work. i recall bill clinton getting elected with 43% of the vote when ross perot split the republicans. it's happening again.

every tea party gathering makes me smile quitely to myself. because i know i'll get to enjoy president obama for 8 years.

yall HATED clinton. and he wound up with 66% approval rating AFTER you tried to impeach him.

it'll probably turn out the same way with obama.

good luck with those tea parties. they look fun!
John Lindauer Apr 3, 2010, 9:43 am
more hilarity. this only proves one thing: republicans are sore losers.

they called roosevelt a commie. (he lead us to victory in WW2.)

they called clinton a commie - then blew up the oklahoma federal building. (and he helped create 23,000,000 jobs - and brought us an economy that outshined Reagan.)

if republicans win, they gloat. if they lose they whine and stomp their feet like babies.

they talk about curbing abortion - but do NOTHING about it.

they talk about tort reform - but do NOTHING about it.

they talk about "winning the war on terror" - but when obama gives us a snowballs chance of actually DOING IT? they call him weak.

why? because they're like yankees fans, or cowboys fans, or raiders fans. they don't care if their team sucks. they're gonna go do swingin'.

GO RAIDERS! GO COWBOYS! GO GOP! KEEP GOING FARTHER TO THE RIGHT UNTIL YOU FALL OFF A CLIFF! (and keep losing. keep whining.)
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