Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 25, 2009, 8:45 pm
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 1999: K and I discussed every step. Neither of us wanted to leave our marriages. Both of us loved our spouses. Both of us had come from homes where our fathers had...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 24, 2009, 8:45 pm
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Late summer/fall 1998: That was it, wasn't it? That was my chance to stop things before they progressed. *sigh* I knew that but thought I could control myself anyway....
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 23, 2009, 9:00 pm
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Spring/Summer 1998: Somewhere during this time, my husband and I began exploring the idea of an open marriage. Neither my husband nor I had much experience outside of each othe...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 22, 2009, 6:40 pm
Part 1 Part 2 1997: My husband and I fell into a DINKS (dual income, no kids) routine. We luxuriated in our new status as middle income. We spoiled ourselves rotten. I joined the gym at work and f...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 20, 2009, 9:03 pm
This is very uncomfortable for me to relive... but, it has come back into the forefront of my mind and I must process it. Please bear with me. Read Part 1 Fall 1996: During this time period, I'...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 19, 2009, 9:01 pm
This is the first of a 10 part series about the affair I had during my marriage. I realize that this might be uncomfortable for many to read. Perhaps you've been through this experience but from t...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 18, 2009, 10:13 pm
I suppose since Rascal and I only see each other twice a month, it is only natural that whatever I'm wearing seems to be practically torn from my body when we're finally alone. One thing he d...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 17, 2009, 9:20 pm
I am a very disciplined person. When my friend Marie and I lived together, she used to make fun of me because I always paid my bills on time (obsessively so) and I would never eat another single morse...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 15, 2009, 7:41 pm
When you fall in love with someone, you learn what gives them pleasure. Maybe they like to hold hands.... or to always have a heavy arm on your shoulder. Maybe they like gentle teasing kisses on the...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 12, 2009, 10:24 pm
I went to lunch with my best friend De yesterday (Veteran's Day). I miss her so much. We rarely get to see each other. She is feeling her bliss right now after being down for a while. Her bliss ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 11, 2009, 9:39 pm
There are some people in my life that I won't talk to about Rascal. I won't mention that his children came into town with him this weekend. I won't discuss how his boys adore me or how my ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 10, 2009, 11:00 pm
All day long I've been sneezing and coughing my head off. I couldn't even take a deep breath without breaking into a full on coughing fit. But the ex offered to take the kids for the night (si...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 9, 2009, 8:28 pm
I feel like shit. I don't think its anything other than a cold or allergies. Nose is running. Sneezing. Eyes watering. Tickle in the throat. Ugh. The worst part of it is that when I feel like ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 8, 2009, 9:25 pm
Over the weekend, while Rascal was visiting with his sons, our hamster went missing. The kids, all 4 of them, began the quest to solve the mystery of the missing hamster like the gang on Scooby Doo. M...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 5, 2009, 8:26 pm
This week has felt a bit off for some reason. I wonder if Monday night's full moon sent the cosmos into craziness or something. It started off well enough... Monday, I ran into a lady at the gr...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 4, 2009, 8:09 pm
As a single mom, and I'm sure all single parents have noticed this, I definitely get use out of both my feminine side and my masculine side. I have to be mom and dad. I have to cook dinner and ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 3, 2009, 8:04 pm
I have learned quite a bit about myself. I have accomplished much. I'm not even the same person I was when I was married. I was contacted by someone wanting to hear my post-divorce story - all th...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 2, 2009, 7:50 pm
If you are my in-real-life friend on Facebook, you will know that Rascal and I are very obviously in love. We try not to get too mushy but yeah, we get pretty mushy. Give us a break! We're still i...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Nov 1, 2009, 2:47 am
My ex-husband is an alcoholic. Now, he would never admit this, mind you. And I never saw it. I'd never been around it and didn't recognize the signs. When we dated, I loved when he would get...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 29, 2009, 8:42 pm
After writing the tear-laden post last night, Rascal called, as he normally does. I was feeling better, after venting all of those ugly feelings, and he was in a very good mood. He was sharing his t...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 28, 2009, 9:40 pm
I can be so ugly at times. *sigh* One of the challenges I've noticed with a long distance relationship is how Rascal and I both react to silence. We text in the mornings or share silly Facebook...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 27, 2009, 9:38 pm
Next week will be the 2nd anniversary of this blog. In that time, I have read and written many blog posts, followed some of my favorite bloggers as they switched domains or blogs, met some of my fav...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 26, 2009, 7:52 pm
Saturday night, I attended a good ole fashioned country cook out with Rascal and his boys. The cook out was hosted by a few of Rascal's hunting buddies at a home out in the middle of nowhere. We ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 25, 2009, 9:03 pm
My sister was heading back to Louisiana over the weekend to reunite with some old friends from school so I tagged along. Its always nice to have yet another excuse to go visit my man. As I waited for...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 22, 2009, 8:10 pm
Last night when the girls and I came home from after school care, we had a message on our answering machine. A sweet little voice said, "Um, hello? This is Michael, from Rose's class. I just want...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 21, 2009, 8:13 pm
Rascal and I are nearing 6 months since he first contacted me on Facebook. In those months, we've gone from getting to know each other to my breaking it off to his confused feelings to let's...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 20, 2009, 8:01 pm
As you can see from my bookshelf, I have a major interest in homeopathy. This leads to an interest in all things natural medicine related. And this leads to many phone calls from family and friends as...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 19, 2009, 10:18 pm
Last week, I heard the new Kelly Clarkson song, Already Gone. The lyrics reminded me of how I felt at the end of my marriage. After we separated, I felt stripped of everything. I couldn't let go ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 18, 2009, 11:48 pm
As an admirer of women, I immediately fell in love with this photo. These are the new "plus size" models as featured in Glamour magazine. Each of the women in the above photograph wears anywhere from ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 16, 2009, 9:50 pm
I took my daughters to see Where the Wild Things Are movie tonight. We've enjoyed the book and the trailer looked fun, so we were all looking forward to seeing it. I couldn't figure out for ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 15, 2009, 8:13 pm
Apparently, you can tell quite a bit about a person by what's on their bookshelf. Though my camera isn't near as pro as RE's, I took some pics of my books too. I can't say this is a...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 14, 2009, 8:16 pm
Rascal's nickname for me is "Angel". He says one of the reasons he's drawn to me is because of my strength, positive nature, forgiving and loving attitude towards all people. Well, sometimes...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 13, 2009, 7:23 pm
I went to the U2 concert last night at the new Dallas Cowboys stadium. Damn, that place is IMPRESSIVE. I'd swear there was a mile distance from my seat to the top back row! Wow! My seat, by the w...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 12, 2009, 8:17 pm
Today as I was catching up with my co-workers, I told them about my trip back to Louisiana to visit Rascal this past weekend. Friday night, Rascal and I spent a nice evening, just the two of us. On ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 11, 2009, 9:31 pm
Do you worry all the time? Do you find yourself constantly wondering the "hows" of your future? Do you replay past moments over and over in your mind and wonder if you could have acted differently? ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 8, 2009, 4:49 pm
My children have fallen in love with Rascal. I mean, who can blame them? I certainly get it. He's good people. He treats them with respect and gives them boundaries. Not many of my friends or fa...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 7, 2009, 2:29 pm
I didn't mean to exhaust everyone with my over-thinking from the past few days. Believe me... you couldn't have been as near exhausted as I was. Sheesh. Even Rascal remarked, "You know this w...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 6, 2009, 12:50 pm
A reader directed me to one of my favorite quotes after yesterday's worrisome post. From another A Course in Miracles student and teacher Marianne Williamson: "We can always choose to perceive th...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 6, 2009, 12:48 pm
"I am not one of those who dates for the sake of dating." I have said that through my entire dating life. If we don't *click*, if there isn't a *connection*, then we simply will not date any...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 6, 2009, 12:48 pm
All of your comments on yesterday's post all said basically the same thing. I am over-thinking. I am worrying too much. It becomes a spiraling effect. I actually have to get it out before I realiz...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 5, 2009, 1:45 pm
I remember talking with a long time friend shortly after the separation from my ex-husband. My husband was my first love and I was trying to have hope that I could love like that again. "Oh no, you ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 4, 2009, 12:32 pm
Last week when I wrote about Grey's Anatomy and the Army surgeon suffering from PTSD, I mentioned on Facebook that it reminded me of Soldier. I received a comment from Love Coach Rinatta: "You kn...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Oct 1, 2009, 7:39 pm
I am endlessly fascinated at what our bodies are capable of. I enjoy training my body and when I see videos like these, I want to work even harder. For those yogis who practice your Sun Salutations.....
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Sep 30, 2009, 8:04 pm
If you were to look at Rascal and me at the surface level, it seems apparent that we are very different. We frequently joke that my "sandal wearing" friends would probably not hang out with his "redn...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Sep 29, 2009, 7:25 pm
I have a favorite area along the Mayan Riviera that I like to visit. There are such wonderful little towns and fishing villages that, in the 20 years I've been traveling to this area, it never get...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Sep 28, 2009, 6:56 pm
I took time this weekend to catch up on the season premier of Grey's Anatomy. If you'll recall, I became smitten with Dr. Owen Hunt, the new Army surgeon on the show, because his reaction to t...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Sep 27, 2009, 10:33 am
I am home from my first 5K run since having my surgery almost 8 weeks ago. I knew I'd be unable to run the 3 miles but I was going to try anyway. I figured a nice slow jog would be perfect for my ...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Sep 25, 2009, 10:31 pm
Two of my favorite things: Sarah McLachlan and the Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi: Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury,pardon; wh...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Sep 24, 2009, 9:49 pm
Tonight I have the house to myself. I finally convinced the ex, on the one night per week that he has the kids, to take them to his place across town. He travels every week with work but occasionally,...
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Tonya Q. posted an article on The Quest for T - Sep 23, 2009, 7:04 pm
I remember the day I finally felt the straw. You know the one?   The one that broke the camel's back? It was a year to the day after I'd found hard evidence of my husband's affair. ...
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